Climbing Partners

This has been a really long week. Joshua was sick and home from school for 4 days; he had his nightmarish episodes a few days in a row; having 3 kids couped up in the house for a whole week is enough to drive the saintliest bonkers; and I think I had a total of maybe 10 hours of sleep all week. Needless to say, I'm Miss Crabby Pants right now. So, thank you for indulging me as I throw a pity-party for myself.

So, good thing that I've been reading an encouraging book called "the mommy diaires...finding yourself in the daily adventure". Just the title itself drew me to it! It's basically a compilation of short essays from Christian moms about their journey through Motherhood. I'm particularly enjoying the segment on Relationships, with the subheading Finding Climbing Partners. Here's a short exerpt from the introduction to this chapter:

(she talks about hiking through the backcountry wilderness)

...Such wilderness adventures are designed for teamwork. So too is motherhood. When we try to go it alone and cut ourselves off from the community around us, we often fail. Severe solitude and lack of accountability, support, and sheer understanding leave us stranded without the proper resources to navigate the road in front of us.

Building and investing in relationships during this season of our lives makes us not only better mothers but also better women. Friends help shape us into the women we were designed to be. They laugh with us over a good story, weep when our dreams remain unfulfilled, and challenge us when we're ready to give up. They become necessities for the journey, protecting not only our health, sanity, and sense of perspective, but also our ability to fully enjoy the path marked out for us. Who are your climbing partners?

Good question, huh? I love that term climbing partners. It really denotes a need for one another, in the truest sense. If you've ever been rock climbing or dappled with indoor rock climbing like I have, you need to have another person with you, because you take turns belaying each other. Without the other person, you can't climb.

Likewise in motherhood. We need to find our group of mommy-friends who we can count on for support during our various circumstance. We all need that one mom-friend who you can call when you need to drop your kids off at their house so you can run an errand, or more importantly, a mom-friend who WANTS TO take your kids from you so that you can have a break (hold on that friend!!); or the friend that is super saavy when it comes to finding the best deals for everything under the sun; or the one who you can trust not to "solve your problems" but to just listen and empathize and help you believe that you're not the worst mom in the world; or another whom you can count on to pray for you when you send her an urgent text for a prayer request...and the list goes on. I don't think there's a "one size fits all" kind of mom (if you can find a friend that fulfills all these rolls, you are truly blessed!), and that's why we need a group of "go-to" mommy friends that we can truly rely on.

Interestingly enough, your climbing buddies tend to emerge when you find yourself in a difficult season. These friends are the ones that tend to pull through for you when you're in need, and are there to stay with you through thick and thin, holding you and standing by you as you navigate through the valleys, and celebrate with you when you emerge.

I like the term Climbing Partners in the Mommy World. I have a similar term for my own personal world, and I call it my Dream Team. My Dream Team consists of a circle of close friends who I can go to, not just for mommy questions, but also for spiritual support and accountability. They are my prayer warriors, friends whom I respect and will speak truth to me. Basically, they are the ones who help me grow closer to God and encourage me to be all that God has created me to be. I encourage you, even more so, to find your Dream Team. And if you have friends in your Dream Team and Climbing Partners who overlap, you are truly blessed! And I thank God for each of my sisters and partners on my journey!

Another quote I like from this chapter is:

As moms, we are called to serve each other in ways that don't make sense or mean much to the outside world but mean everything to us

For example, only moms know that you should knock on the door when you come visit instead of ringing the doorbell because that will wake the baby; only moms know that a Starbucks latte can make a day better! There are so many ways to serve and love one another, and it takes knowing and being known to allow us to figure out each other's needs and how we each receive and give love.

There's so much more that I can say about friendship (maybe in later posts?). Ultimately, friendship is a two-way street. It requires time and effort. But that's how it's played. And everyone who plays, wins. You can't expect deep friendships to occur overnight. It needs time, nurture, attention, and INTENTION. I pray that you will all find your Climbing partners or Dream Team.

(P.S. So this past week is a good example, where I've been couped up at home tending to sick kids and neglecting my own needs. Those moms (and mom-in-law!) who helped in various capacities (okay, and Jared!)...thank you for being my climbing buddies! You've been a blessing to me, and it made my week more bearable!)